Last week I had the privilege of serving as a panelist for America the Beautiful screenings in Chattanooga, Nashville, and Birmingham. I had seen the movie last year, and I was thrilled to be able to share it with my co-workers, friends, and family.
The film was even more inspiring and empowering than the first time I saw it. Surprisingly, it was very moving to have my teenage sons there for one of the screenings. The film made me think a lot about how conceptualizations of beauty affect girls and women, but I’m not sure I had thought much about how perceptions of beauty affect boys and men until my sons were there with me. There was a part of the movie where these Neanderthal young men sat on a couch and talked about how beautiful women should be cloned; how most females aren’t as smart as the average male; and how women truly are objects.
The first time I saw the film, I was mortified because I was convinced that I would learn that these men were from the South and were perpetuating old stereotypes. After the South was vindicated by the announcement that the men were from other geographical areas, I was able to feel other emotions, mostly anger.
It wasn’t until the last viewing of the film that I actually felt sorry for the men. Darryl had said it several times, but it didn’t register until my own sons were in there. The Neanderthals were just as much victims as the 12-year-old model, the 12-year-old girl who thought she was ugly, and the woman mauled by plastic surgery.
We’re all victims- males, females, old, young…what makes it so difficult is that it is impossible to identify the assailant in this scenario- Is it Hollywood? Is it advertisers? Is it the media? Is it our culture? How do you fight a war, when you don’t know your enemy?
One thing I did learn is who the enemy isn’t- it isn’t men. They’re victims as well. So how do you fight an “enemy-less” war? Darryl answered that question- just one battle at a time. I feel like I can do that. So, I’ll fight my small battles- if that means writing a letter to an offending company, boycotting a certain brand, or even lobbying state legislators for better insurance coverage for eating disorders.
It may not feel like I’m winning the war, but maybe it will make a difference, if not in my own lifetime… at least that of my sons.
Photos from our showing in Birmingham
Discussion Panel after the film
Filmmaker Darryl Roberts
With the Magnolia Creek staff
With the EDCA staff
